Stanley Carvalho: A tribute to my father: My world, my life

• A pillar of strength
• My shoulder to lean on
• My confidant

I remember the days you pushed me on the road on my bicycle which you bought me, up and down till I mastered the art of “balance”. Your perseverance in this simple exercise taught me that good things take time and you need to practice to be perfect. Balance was the key to your success, dada; I saw how you meticulously balanced the home, work, me and my school work to ensure that no stone was left unturned.

Your star-studded career commenced at Pfizer and then American Hoechst in New York; however, advertising was your passion and you became the master of it. Even today you are regarded as the “gentleman in advertising”. I am proud to call you my father. You never failed to teach me the A, B, Cs of Communications and Marketing, and most importantly the importance in reading and increasing your knowledge. Your words ring through my head even now: “Reading maketh the full man, not TV.” Thank you, dada, for this.

You taught me to appreciate good food and I remember our Sunday brunch days where we enjoyed our food together after our Sunday mass. You had your regular table at the window where I would join you not every Sunday because I simply couldn’t afford it! As the jazz band played your favourite song during brunch, I could see the enjoyment as I gazed into your eyes; sadly, those days will never come back now dada but I am glad we got the time for this.

My education in the US was a dream for me at the start but you made it a reality. You took me and dropped me off in Arizona in the late ’90s. I remember when I had to say goodbye to you and you said, “Come back with me and I’ll send you back.” It was hard for us to part ways then because it was barely five years since mama left us, but we got through it. I graduated and stayed back and worked for a few more years before I called it quits and came home to you. My 10 years in Arizona were the best of my life, and this was all possible because of the sacrifices which you endured to give me the dream which you had when you lived in New York. Thank you, dada, I will go back soon to “relive” our dream once again.

As the years started rolling on, starting catching up, I tried and gave you the same love and care which you gave me through my younger years; I hope I succeeded in that dada. I did my best for you because you gave me nothing but the best from the day I was born.

That Saturday afternoon when you left me it had to be in the car you bought me, and I had to be next to you. Jesus saw you ageing and called you home, where he will take care of you and mama. The loneliness is too much for me dada, the void you left will never be filled again. I ask myself the question: “Why did you leave me alone dada?” It’s a selfish thing to say, I know that, but I really miss you so much. It’s been only one month and I know there is much more loneliness that awaits me. Your life has been nothing short of a celebration. A life which you led according to your favourite song by Frank Sinatra, “I did my way”.

My dada. My life. My love. I love you and miss you and long for the day when we can be united once again.

Your son,

Pradeep Carvalho