Blue moon calling!

Robinson Crusoe is very much alive! He has been living alone in Australia’s Restoration Island for 20 years. Well, not quite alone. He has some company, a dog and a mannequin.

The Aussie Government handed a third of the island to businessman David Glasheen who promised to build a fishing resort. But fate had other plans for him. His wife left him and the stock market crashed.

 No link has been established between the two events even though a majority of men believe that behind all misfortune is always a woman. A distraught Glasheen embraced complete vicissitude, seeking solitude in his own island, but not before convincing his new girlfriend and a shapely mannequin to go along. She left after six months. No, not the mannequin; the other blonde.

After a 20-year wait for a new fishing resort, the Government wants the modern-day Crusoe out. Now in his sixties, he refuses to leave. Every story has a moral. This one admonishes you to be wary of the stock market and mannequins in the flesh.

They pump and dump at will, I mean in the stock market. No surprise how some of us got wiped out while others became stock barons.

For Pete’s sake (you can replace the name with anyone you may be particularly fond of), don’t call them the mafia. If you can’t fight them, join them.

If you can’t do that, lease out a nice piece of crown land (just tell them that you plan to build a fishing village) and say hello to a whole new life. Oh, don’t forget your mannequin! I have mine, a dozen of them, in fact. All I need is a desolate island!

An email from a reader, Arthur Silva, disturbed my equilibrium. Did you realise that the Indians now owned our provinces, too? He meant the Sri Lanka Premier League cricket teams. He has a point.

The Indian invasion is sweeping across the land right under our noses. For the far-sighted burly neighbours, the entire post-war Sri Lanka is one bullish stock market and unlike our own kith and kin, they aren’t in it for a quick kill.

Look who’s got the bragging rights for Uva Next, Wayamba United and Nagenahira Nagas? Next on the cards are vexatious provincial councils.

It’s the night of the SLPL finals. It’s also the night of this month’s second full moon. Most years have 12 full moons, each one making a monthly appearance.

Each lunar cycle is approximately 29.5 days and once the 12 cycles are complete, they leave our solar calendar with about 11 extra days.

Every two to three years with the accumulation of the extra days, there comes an extra full moon, and no bonus shares for guessing, that’s known as the blue moon.

So folks, it’s once in a blue moon chance of catching it and don’t blame the mafia if it really turns up blue.

While you are at it, here’s one for the mind. Why did the cow jump over the moon? Mail me your answers. And here’s one for the ones with a bullish waistline. If you weigh 150 pounds on earth, it’s a featherweight 25 pounds on the moon; a big reason to make an early booking on the lunar colony slated for a grand opening sometime after 21 December.

P.S. A quick thank you to Sri Lanka Cricket on behalf of all of us, for finally ending a treacherous drought.

(Dinesh Watawana is a former foreign correspondent and military analyst. He is a brand consultant and heads The 7th Frontier, an integrated communications agency which masterminded the globally-acclaimed eco tourism hotspot KumbukRiver. Email him at [email protected].)